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August 17, 2011 / John Sieger

Code 9

Click: Code 9

Your guess is as good as mine as to what a Code 9 is. It sounds like it’s from outer space, but I think that might be Plan 9. One thing I know is it doesn’t sound like good news coming from a traffic cop when you’ve been pulled over. I did some research on the web came up with many conflicting definitions. Here’s my favorite, I found it at urbandictionary.com: In code 9, u simply press “9” when your parent or sibling is watching over your shoulder as you type. That way, the other person will know what you are talkin’  about, and begin a conversation about homework or something. (By the way, you might want to take a pass on that site if you are not real fond of the “F” bomb.) So… Why don’t I know what a Code 9 is? You guessed it!… the lyrics are by Michael Feldman and quite droll when you listen to them. The guy is trying to beat a ticket with a sob story about trying seeing his baby. We all know how romantic traffic cops are. (Incidentally, the state police arrested a guy in Racine last night who was going 150 on his motorcycle. His explanation? He had a date!) It reminds me of my favorite scene in Albert Brooks’ Lost In America. In it he is trying to appeal to the warm and fuzzy instincts of a Las Vegas casino owner after his wife has lost every dime they had at the tables. As likely to convince as the traffic ticket scenario. Probably the way to handle that situation would be found in a Quentin Tarantino or Cohen brothers film. But I don’t endorse violence. What I do endorse is the occasional measure of 2/4 and an odd eastern-sounding harmony to trip up any of today’s kids who’d like to learn this song. Drive safe!

© 2011 John Sieger/Michael Feldman

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